Erika's thee name!

It has been awhile since I have been on here. Nothing has really changed. Been going to school. Don’t have a job right now, but I will be going into my internship in the Spring for school. Hopefully I get hired in. School is going good. This semister has been pretty easy. I dont have to read and I loveee that.

Rachel McConal and I became best friends. It is werid I never would of seen this coming. When we last spoke I punched her in the face lol. We are mature and got over that. She is deff my best friend, and someone I can trust. I can tell her anythign and she will be there to help me. She is havign a baby.

Stephanei Smith is also my bestie STILL. She has not left myside. She is prego and I am  so excicted. She is having a boy. She is goign to be a great mother. She is always there for me no matter what. We have been best friends for alomost 3 years. she understands me, and can tell me the truth. When something is wrong she dont lie to me about it and I love that.

Kyle and I are doing great. Our 2 years is next month yayyy. He still is here dealing with my crazy ass lol. Noone will deal with him either, so we are stuck together forever. I know we wil get married. Somtiem in the future though because I am not down for it yet and neither is he. He is my best friend and I dont know wht I would do without him. If I am crying he is the first person there making me feel better, and he always does. If I have noone to hang out with I can go downstairs and ther will be Kyle =] He is so sexy and hot and beautiful =] I LOVE U SEXY BUTTHOLE

My family and I are getting along good. My mom is doing a lot better since the dog attack. My brother likes to give everyone attitude though. He will grow out of it soon I hope. My family means everythign ot me. Without them I would not be the person I am today. They always pushed me to do my greatest. They are always there, and no mattter what I knwo I always have them. I love them all very much.

I got a new puppy his name is Arby. It was Harvy but we changed it. He is a good boy. He was abused and it takes awhile forh im to get use to people. He is not use to Kyle yet. I think that the abuser looks like Kyle or sounded like Kyle. When he gets scared he pees everywhere. He is a smart dog. I love him.

Arby does not replace Zeus. I miss Zeusy so much., I was use to his ways and I need to remember Arby is not Zeus. I wish Zeus was still around. I deff wish I would of seen him full grown. He wa only 1 year and 4 months. He weighted 95 pouds and had to get up to 130 to be full grown. He would of been huge! Even though he attacked my mom I see him as a great dog. Everyone that knows him knows he was a baby.

It has been awhile since I wrote on here. I guess I am going to get out how I feel…

My dog Zeus got shot on October 16 , 2010! He was only 1 year and 4 months. My mom came home from the store, and he just went crazy and attacked her. She dragged him outside, so people could see what he is doing. They had to shoot him because he would not leave my moms side. I understand why he had to be shot, but I wish he never had done this to my mom. My mom almost died, and I would of lost it. The doctor said she is lucky to be alive, that if she didnt have fat arms she would be dead. That had me have a wake up call. I started to realize what is important in life, and to work on problems I am having. I am so thankful my mom is still alive. We  found out the reason why he attacked was because he was mentally retarted =[ He just could not take whatever was going on in his head..

I miss Zeus very much. He was my child. I have no kids, and he was one of my kids. I did everythign with him. He was always by me. If I were to be up, and everyone else is sleeping he would stay up with me. It is hard at times, and I start to really miss him. He was a great dog, and I will remember him that way. He was sucha big baby. He loved all of us very much. I will always love him, and he will always be my baby! RIP ZEUSY!

Besides that not much as been going on. Stephanie Bundy and I are not friends. That is a good thing though becasue I was getting sick of how fake she was. She would talk so much shit about people, but then confronted she would say she didnt say it. I mean come on I know you did. She made me out to be the lyer, and made up lies, so that people would get on her side. Well one person is seeing how she is, and beilives me. That is the person she tried to get againts me. My feeling is if you talk shit about someone, and then are confronted by it, then tell the damn truth. People get more mad when you lie!! I have so much stress gone now that her and I are not friends =]

I have realized a lot. I know now who to trust, and who not to trust. I may not have many friends, but that is okay that way. I don’t have a lot of drama, and whoever is still there I have fun with. Stephanie Smith is my best friend, and she has been for awhile. She is the one person that did not leave my side. Kyle, has always been there for almost 2 years. I love him so much. I am glad we are still together! My mom, dad, and brother also been there FOREVER! I dont know what I would do without them. I say fuck the haters =]

Kyle and I are doing great! Our 1 year and 7 moths is today! I am so glad I met him. He makes me so happy. Of course we have our fights, but all couples do. He completes me =] He is there no matter what. He has seen me hit rock bottom, and he still has not left my side. He is there in every way for me. I am so glad we got together. I can see myself marrying him one day. He says he will never get married, but I know he will =] He said he will never live with a girl, never get a girl a ring, BUT he has done all that with me =] I am the happiest I have ever been. Yeah we both put each other through a lot of bullshit, but we worked past that. I trust him 100% I know when he says hes going somewhere he goes there, and does not sneak around my back and do something stupid. He is the FIRST boyfriend i have been with that has not cheated on me. I know that sounds stupid, but it is the truth. I am glad he has not cheated on me because it would make me not trust him for awhile. It would be in the back of my head all the time if he would do it again, but I am glad he did not cheat =] We are perfect for each other. People have said their nasty shit to us, but fuck them. We are going to be together no matter what! I love you Kyle always&forever!

My family and I have gotten a lot closer. I am not being as bitchy as I use to be, but of course I have my days. Ever since my moms attack that helped me open up my eyes. I almost lost my mom, and I don’t need to fight with her, I need to get closer to her. We have always been close, but I was sucha bitch to her. Now we get along great. Barley get into fights. I love my family very much. I only have my mom, dad, and brother for family. My grandparents died when I was 10, and my other grandparents don’t give a fuck about me. I don’t have any aunt and uncles. My aunt and uncles on my mom’s side are mean to her, so they can fuck off. I do talk to my dads brother once in awhile. My dads other brother passed away, so I have no aunts and uncles. It sucks sometimes becasue people talk about how they are going to so many realtives house, and I go nowhere. Oh wel though at least I still have my mom, dad, and brother. I love them all so much, and they mean everythign to me. I would do ANYTHING for them! Noone comes before any of them =]

School is going good. Fall term is almost done. I am pretty sure I am going to get on the deans list =] I have been doing really good in all my classes. I am on some new meds for my bypolor. THey are working really good. I dont get depressed as much. Its funny though becasue everytime I fight with someone they say “Your Crazy did you take your meds today?” And I laugh everytime they say that. I know I have a mental problem, and I came to reality with that. Noone is going to hurt me for saying that bullshit because I have an exuese to be crazy, and people who say that stupid shit to me don’t have no exuse =] I am starting to realize my true friends, and everyone else can fuck off. I have a lot of people who hate me, but they can talk shit all they want. I know that I am on their minds when they talk shit, and they have a pathtic life!  

13 years of being best friends is gone. Whenever you get a boyfriend you think of all exuses to not hang out with me. I have been there for you, but now that you have a job you are a total bitch and don’t care about anyone but your boyfriend. I can’t belive you will let 13 years go and yet not give a fuck! I am done tryig I have tried and tried.

I can’t talk to you about ANYTHIng when you are in the wrong because you flip out. I use to be like that until I found out I am bypolor and I have medicie to help me not freak out. Maybe you need to get looked at. Not meaning it in a bad way, but it would really help you be able to deal with problems without freaking out. I have tried to help you

I just dont get why when you get a boyfriend you turn into a total bitch and forget everyone that was ALWAYS there for you. You have been dating him for 3 months and you act like hes been there for you through everything.

You tell me that I need to get a life. I am trying. I go to school and I am trying to find a job. Maybe I don’t try hard, but you don’t need to sit there on your high horse because you have a job. You would of never found it if your ex didnt help you. You would be in the same boat Iam because its hard to find jobs.

Maybe us not being friends is a good thing. I can find a friend that I can talk to without them flipping out. Yeah, I have my flaws to but when I am someones friend I try to be a good one. You are only a good one when you are single. You need to do a lot of growing up in the friend department.

What’s up world? Haven’t been doing much lately! School is out for the summer. I just got a call today for internship in the fall. If they do a background check I am fucked. I have use of marijuana on my record. It will be off in a year when I am done with probation. My dean I am tryign to keep this a sercect from. If they do a background check, well there goes my secrete.

I just got back from bowling. I didn’t do good tonight as I did last week. Last week I got 5 strikes in a row. Score of 173! Never goin to do that again. When I was bowling today something in my back popped! It hurt like a mother fucker!

Well, I haven’t did much these days. I watched season one and two of True Blood for two days. I love that show. Thanks Maria for getting me hooked!

I am getting so sick of having to get ahold of people, and they don’t know how to use a phone to get ahold of me. It’s not like you don’t have my number. I am done trying.

Well peace out readers!

Shit nothings really been going on. The normal school. I can’t wait for summer break :) I go to court to get sentenced on the 21. I hope I only get six months of probation instead of two years. Kyle’s bday is the 24th we are going out to Chuckey Cheese haha. I can’t wait. Casino also. We went to the casino tonight, and lost of course. Well I am going to go to bed. Night all! RIP Taylor Wayne Varco. We all miss you so much. I am so sorry for what you have to see. Karma is a bitch :)

So lately really haven’t been doing anything. School this semister is pretty easy. I love all my teachers and the classes! My paper that is due on Tuesday I got almost done. I just need to do one more page =]

I have been hearing a lot of people still like to talk shit about Taylor after he is dead. What Megan is doing to him is WRONG. Yeah, I think she should be happy, but not with a MCCLEAN. The Mccleans Taylor hated, and Megan is with them. They sit here and talk shit about Taylor, but Megan still hangs out with them. She made a comment saying she since shes with Aaaron Mcclean she wishes she wishes she never got with Taylor. Well I am sorry you say you didn’t say that, and I just don’t belive you. I am sitting here telling the truth and you make me out to be the lyer. Everyone needs to stop having Megans back and listing to her fake stories. Shes the one that made Taylor do it, so don’t feel bad for her. I know she did because tay was here all the time talkin about how she fucked him over . I seen it with my own eyes.

Enough about Megan. It’s been so shitty out the last couple of days. Today I am not feeling too good. I am just going to chill around the house and wait for my besties to get ahold of me.